The View From the Desert

Oct 31, 2023 | Challenges In Adoption, Parenting

Cactus and scrub trees everywhere. One hundred ten degrees (43°C). Sudden thirst. These were the first things we sensed when we arrived in the Arizona desert. However, we noticed that people carried on normal activities despite heat and most insulated themselves with air conditioning as much as possible.

Like a drop of water that quickly disappears on parched ground, after adopting we found it impossible to satisfy our sons’ need for love. We wanted to show affection to our children, to water them emotionally, and watch them grow. But they seemed to resist our efforts, and every ounce of warmth was swallowed up by them and their needs. How could we get them to realize that loving care was more that the immediate satisfaction of a desire? Maybe a fire hose dousing them with all the affection they needed would quench their thirst? They quickly drank up every ounce of endearment we showed them and wanted more.

We learned that love needed to become a way of life and a series of choices and decisions about how to relate to them. It was more than a faucet that we would turn on and off. Even when they were not looking, we wanted them to be flooded with our tenderness. In short, we were to imitate the love that God had shown to us as His children, His own self-sacrificial and generous love. He chose to love us even when we did not love Him back. He gave us way more than a swimming pool’s worth of compassion in a desert.

Just as cacti bloom in the desert if they have enough moisture, so our children started to blossom over time. We had to continue to water them with the kindness and acceptance they so desperately needed and (even though they didn’t say so) wanted. They came to know the infinite love of God.

What have you discovered that made your children blossom in the desert? Please feel free to leave a comment in the space below.

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Marcellus George

Marcellus George and his loving wife are the adoptive parents of (now adult) twin sons. He is the author of numerous articles and devotions, has a Ph.D. in theology... Read More